Archive for the 'shellshear' Category
Friday, May 6th, 2005
| State of body |
Appeared to be gently suffocated with a wet towel. No, I am not going to say “Mostly Harmless”. |
| Detail of inspection |
Inspected once. |
| Forensic Investigator |
shellshear |
| Comments |
After an enormous surge of relief that it did not embarass us, we were slightly disappointed to note that it was, nonetheless, dead. |
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Posted in Comedy, Forensic Analysis, H, Science Fiction, shellshear | 5 Comments »
Tuesday, March 22nd, 2005
| State of body |
A pathetic shrivelled husk, drained of vital fluids. |
| Detail of inspection |
Inspected once. |
| Forensic Investigator |
shellshear |
| Comments |
Mediocre in every respect – given the wealth of existing material to draw on, it is bizarre they could have come up with something so bland. An ideal FF candidate. |
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Posted in Action, C, Comic Book, Forensic Analysis, shellshear | 2 Comments »
Tuesday, March 1st, 2005
| State of body |
Badly burned, yet strangely… delicious. |
| Detail of inspection |
Inspected twice. |
| Forensic Investigator |
shellshear |
| Comments |
Bubba is a competent Mummy, but is not fulfilling his promise. Needs to try harder, and not crib so much from his older brother’s book. |
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Posted in B, Comedy, Forensic Analysis, Horror, shellshear | No Comments »
Sunday, February 13th, 2005
| State of body |
Dead. Just generically dead. No particular cause of death, just the usual, you know, stuff. |
| Detail of inspection |
Inspected once. |
| Forensic Investigator |
shellshear |
| Comments |
Could barely have been more generic. |
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Posted in A, Action, Forensic Analysis, Horror, Science Fiction, shellshear | 2 Comments »
Sunday, February 6th, 2005
| State of body |
Restful. Seemingly content and at peace. |
| Detail of inspection |
Inspected four times. |
| Forensic Investigator |
shellshear |
| Comments |
Took quite some time to realise that subject was not dead, but merely very, very relaxed. |
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Posted in Comedy, O, shellshear | No Comments »
Monday, December 27th, 2004
| State of body |
One could only call it badly decomposed if it was actually composed in the first place. |
| Detail of inspection |
Inspected once. |
| Forensic Investigator |
shellshear |
| Comments |
Corpse was found buried in a garden. Not, however, nearly buried well enough. Appeared to have been dug up a number of times previously. |
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Posted in Horror, S, Thriller, shellshear | 1 Comment »
Saturday, December 18th, 2004
| State of body |
Riddled with tiny vampiric maggots. |
| Detail of inspection |
Inspected once. |
| Forensic Investigator |
shellshear |
| Comments |
Stillborn. |
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Posted in Action, Fantasy, V, shellshear | 26 Comments »
Monday, October 25th, 2004
| State of body |
Much to our surprise, what we thought was a body turned out to be a cunningly carved giant carrot. |
| Detail of inspection |
Inspected once. |
| Forensic Investigator |
shellshear |
| Comments |
Extremely perplexing why someone would have gone to such incredible effort in carefully crafting this pseudo-body, since it had decayed almost to nothing by the time we were able to examine it. |
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Posted in S, Science Fiction, Thriller, shellshear | 6 Comments »
Tuesday, October 19th, 2004
| State of body |
Fresh, despite advanced age. |
| Detail of inspection |
Inspected many, many times. |
| Forensic Investigator |
shellshear |
| Comments |
Subject had all of us here at Film Forensics a little awed, but went out of its way to put us at our ease. Was only, after all, human. |
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Posted in S, Science Fiction, shellshear | 2 Comments »
Monday, October 11th, 2004
| State of body |
Battered about the head and shoulders, but not quite dead. |
| Detail of inspection |
Inspected once. |
| Forensic Investigator |
shellshear |
| Comments |
Subject lucky to have survived – had been declared dead, but lurched off the autopsy table before autopsy started. Currently playing video games in visitor’s area. |
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Posted in Comedy, Horror, S, Zombies, shellshear | No Comments »
Tuesday, October 5th, 2004
| State of body |
Appeared to be a fit young man, but worn out through too many repetitions of the same exercise. On closer inspection, a great deal older than he first appeared. |
| Detail of inspection |
Inspected once. |
| Forensic Investigator |
shellshear |
| Comments |
Some confusion about what happened to the body – it disappeared before autopsy proper could begin. |
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Posted in Action, B, Thriller, shellshear | No Comments »
Monday, September 27th, 2004
| State of body |
Appears to have been shot, beaten, drowned, burned, bitten, poisoned and stabbed, all without permanent ill-effect. Fatal wounds – a startling accumulation of paper-cuts – appear to be self-inflicted. |
| Detail of inspection |
Inspected four times. |
| Forensic Investigator |
shellshear |
| Comments |
Suicide note indicated subject was tired. So very tired. |
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Posted in Action, I, shellshear | 1 Comment »
Sunday, September 19th, 2004
| State of body |
Disheveled and distended. |
| Detail of inspection |
Inspected twice. |
| Forensic Investigator |
shellshear |
| Comments |
Subject was rambling and incoherent prior to death – possible suicide. |
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Posted in Action, Comic Book, Fantasy, L, shellshear | 6 Comments »
Friday, September 10th, 2004
| State of body |
Drained of blood. |
| Detail of inspection |
Inspected twice. |
| Forensic Investigator |
shellshear |
| Comments |
Subject was very old, and quite cold when discovered. Didn’t appear to have any family or loved ones. |
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Posted in Action, Fantasy, U, shellshear | No Comments »
Thursday, September 2nd, 2004
| State of body |
Second-degree burns, bite-marks, and minor gun-shot wounds. |
| Detail of inspection |
Inspected once. |
| Forensic Investigator |
shellshear |
| Comments |
Death due an accumulation of small wounds. Nothing fatal in itself. |
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Posted in Action, Comic Book, H, Horror, shellshear | 3 Comments »
Thursday, August 26th, 2004
| State of body |
Not actually dead. |
| Detail of inspection |
Inspected five times to make sure. |
| Forensic Investigator |
shellshear |
| Comments |
A puzzling case – initially thought to be dead, then seriously ill, and now seems to be fine, though with a slight cough. |
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Posted in Fantasy, T, shellshear | No Comments »
Thursday, August 19th, 2004
| State of body |
Recently in a fight, but wounds only superficial. Death due to head injuries sustained in fall. |
| Detail of inspection |
Inspected once. |
| Forensic Investigator |
shellshear |
| Comments |
Tried to cushion the blow by landing on a big pile of books. Missed them. |
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Posted in Action, I, Science Fiction, shellshear | No Comments »
Thursday, August 12th, 2004
| State of body |
Peaceful, though with signs of recent struggle. Fair condition. |
| Detail of inspection |
Inspected once. |
| Forensic Investigator |
shellshear |
| Comments |
Potentially challenging, but in the end, a straightforward case. Not nearly as novel as the setup might have suggested. |
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Posted in E, Science Fiction, shellshear | No Comments »
Thursday, August 5th, 2004
| State of body |
Bloated, decomposing |
| Detail of inspection |
Seen Reloaded twice, Revolutions once. |
| Forensic Investigator |
shellshear |
| Comments |
Major reconstruction required for open-casket funeral. Suggestions enclosed. |
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Posted in Action, M, Science Fiction, shellshear | 3 Comments »
Thursday, July 29th, 2004
| State of body |
Eaten alive by nostalgic fans of original film. |
| Detail of inspection |
Inspected once. |
| Forensic Investigator |
shellshear |
| Comments |
Subject failed to wear protective clothing in hazardous environment. |
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Posted in D, Horror, Zombies, shellshear | No Comments »