Archive for the 'Comic Book' Category

Fantastic Four

Friday, November 30th, 2007
State of body A super-powered corpse that won’t trouble you with too many deeper questions.
Detail of Inspection Inspected twice.
Forensic Investigator winstoninabox
Comments Family friendly fun.

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Spider-Man 3

Saturday, July 7th, 2007
State of Body Watchable. Enjoyable. Unmemorable.
Detail of Inspection Inspected once.
Forensic Investigator winstoninabox
Comments Great action. ’nuff said.

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X2

Monday, May 7th, 2007
State of Body Viable, but has signs of future instability.
Detail of Inspection Inspected a few times.
Forensic Investigator winstoninabox
Comments This body is in pretty good nick. If only it had kept to the cast established in the first one. I think I’m mixing my metaphors. Oh well.

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The Punisher

Sunday, January 15th, 2006
State of Body Punished (Sorry, I couldn’t resist)
Detail of Inspection Inspected 3 times.
Forensic Investigator winstoninabox
Comments This body was unable to survive the multiple cuts of budget and length.

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Batman Begins

Wednesday, December 28th, 2005
State of body Exquisitely preserved, apart from the fact that all the water in it had been instantaneously turned into steam.
Detail of inspection Inspected twice.
Forensic Investigator shellshear
Comments A tragic pity that the body ended up on the slab. It nearly escaped injury altogether, except for one fatal miscalculation regarding a microwave steam gun.

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Hulk

Sunday, July 31st, 2005
State of body Killed by a bizarre mutation - partly normal, and partly something very, very strange.
Detail of inspection Inspected five times.
Forensic Investigator shellshear
Comments Seems to be a normal comic-book movie that has been partially attacked by another Film Forensics reviewer who wanted to turn it into something infinitely stranger. More power to them.

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Catwoman

Tuesday, March 22nd, 2005
State of body A pathetic shrivelled husk, drained of vital fluids.
Detail of inspection Inspected once.
Forensic Investigator shellshear
Comments Mediocre in every respect - given the wealth of existing material to draw on, it is bizarre they could have come up with something so bland. An ideal FF candidate.

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Daredevil

Saturday, December 18th, 2004
State of Body Dismembered superhero.
Detail of Inspection Inspected three times.
Forensic Investigator winstoninabox
Comments The messy corpse hides the wealth of forethought put into this movie.

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The league of Extraordinary Gentlemen

Sunday, September 19th, 2004
State of body Disheveled and distended.
Detail of inspection Inspected twice.
Forensic Investigator shellshear
Comments Subject was rambling and incoherent prior to death - possible suicide.

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Hellboy

Thursday, September 2nd, 2004
State of body Second-degree burns, bite-marks, and minor gun-shot wounds.
Detail of inspection Inspected once.
Forensic Investigator shellshear
Comments Death due an accumulation of small wounds. Nothing fatal in itself.

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